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   生命的無常,是無常先到還是明天先到,人再有錢也買不到時間和智慧,人還有一個無奈,就是不知道下1分鐘會發生什么事情。
   唐可是我認識時間不是很長而很快走進我心里的朋友,也許她是牧師,她對人的善良與愛拉近了我們的距離,現在我只要到哥倫布就有想要在她家住一個晩上的念頭,每一次在她家里,她總是給我很多的能量。她總是對我説一句話,我們人是有限的,但上帝是無限的。她要把她的家人,她最愛的弟弟大偉介紹給我認識,我們説好一起在11月3日去芝加哥見她的弟弟,而他弟弟十分體貼我們,表示因爲他印第安那也有房子,讓我們在那里跟他會面,11月4日住大偉的家,這是我與唐可去華盛頓後第二次一起去過一個短期度假。


   我的一位好朋友,也是一位鋼琴家,她是榮獲鋼琴格萊美大奬的張安麟,她的父母也住在印第安那,我要介紹唐可與他們認識。大家非常高興期待我們的相逢。就星期一的早晨,唐可打電話説他的弟弟,我們一起要去印第安納的大偉,星期天心臟病走了,去見上帝了,大偉69歲,葬禮安排在這個星期五上午,也就是我們下午要見面的同一天,我還沒有來得及認識他的弟弟.....
   唐可的弟弟大偉是一直幫助他的哥哥唐仲英經營企業,當我知道這個不幸的消息後,就和中國上海僑務辦公室陶主任微信聯繫,因爲在90年代,大偉幫助哥哥爲中美兩國的文化做了很多貢獻。

   唐可的父親是著名企業家唐炳麟先生,他在中國上海很有名,他娶了三位太太。這三位太太各生一個兒子,這三個兒子一起合作,在美國經營鋼鐵企業,唐可吿訴我,她有一個非常了不起的爸爸,爸爸愛所有的人,爸爸敎育大哥,雖然不是同一母親,你是老大,一定要照顧好弟弟,有父親的愛,唐家在美國的企業越做越大,在美國成爲鋼鐵大王的唐仲英有二個基金會,唐仲英幫助了無數來自中國的留學生,他對中國的敎育文化醫學做了杰出的貢獻,唐仲英在芝加哥還有一個唐仲英中國館(Cyrus Tang Hall of China)

 

   我和唐可有緣相識相知,我們今年四月一起在上海,6月一起去華盛頓認識她的大兒子一家人,11月4日,在哥倫布又認識她小兒子一家人,唐可有2個孝順的兒子,唐可自己不僅善良而且智慧,唐可鋼琴碩士畢業于茱莉亞大學,唐可在UNC鋼琴博士只讀了一年就畢業了,她在美國哈弗肯尼迪劇院,俄國,德國等地演出,50歲那年,她認識到,未來舞臺要讓給更年輕的人,她到Duke 大學讀了四年神學,做了牧師,因爲先生去見了上帝,所以她才到哥倫布與兒子相聚。
   其實我們明白:今天再大的事,到了明天就是小事;今年再大的事,到了明年就是故事;今生再大的事,到了來世就是傳説,我們最多也就是個有故事的人。生活中、人最大的利益就是活着,唐可吿訴我,弟弟大偉今年六月就安排他們兄弟姐妹在拉斯維加斯哥哥唐仲英家相聚,過去他們每年節日都在芝加唐仲英家渡過。現在我們6兄弟姐妹只有四人還在,而今年籌辦的人已經去見上帝了 。

    David Daway Tang was born to a very poor family in Hong Kong, as an only son after 3 girls had already preceded him. The whole family was female, mother, grandmother, 3 sisters and one maid. Born on Christmas day in 1947, he was indeed a present from the good Lord. As his eldest sister who is six year his senior, I had ample opportunity to observe and impact his growing up. He was always a good boy, with just a little bit of mischief in him. He loved our Mom in a special way and he had a strong sense of responsibility as the only "man" in the family. When Mom was sad because she did not have enough money to buy nutritious food for her 4 children, David wwould comfort her by holding her hand as a child of no more than 6 or 7, saying, "Mom, don't cry! When I grow up, you will have everything!" And he made good his promise! David loved to sit at my feet and let me impart knowledge to him! He would learn what is the longest river in the world, the highest mountain, etc. from me. We called these session "talking knowledge." He also learned how to play badminton from me, eventually winning a badminton scholarship to UCLA in Los Angeles. While we two elder girls went to British high schools, David and Sister 3 went to Chinese schools. David went to a Mandarin speaking high school which emphasized religious education, called "Bethel" on the Kowloon (Peninsula side of Hong Kong). So he mastered Shanghainese (spoken with mom and grandma), Cantonese, the dialect used in Hong Kong, and Mandarin, the dialect used in his school and also in a number of churches.


    Mother was a strong Christian so all of us children grew up as Christians. Wew knew what it meant to live by faith, to depend on God for our very sustenance. We never had to go without food but for months we had chicken dumpling --without the chicken! After David graduated from High School, he studied a year or two at Baptist College in Hong Kong and then he went to the US and studied at UCLA. But college was not his thing. Although I was newly married and my husband and I put him through two years or so at UCLA, he eventually decided to quit and to make money instead. A wise decision on his part! Mother by then had come to the US also, since her entire brood of 4 are now all abroad. Mother lived with David for many years. David took such good care of her. Wherever he lived, there lived mother! He kept his word to take care of her, relieving us sisters to other pursuits in life. For example, my husband and I were able to go as missionaries to the Philippines and Taiwan for about 10 years. Without David caring for mother, we could not have gone.


Eventually David married--after being constantly prodded by mother--left to his own devices, he would rather stay single to give her a good life and undivided attention.
   David was the first in our family to marry a Caucasian. They had a girl and a boy. Mother lived with them most of the time during their marriage. There was friction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law considering the differences in custom and upbringing. So to make life a little easier for David, part of the year when Chicago was too bitterly cold, David would bring mother to me in North Carolina where the winter was milder. He would come to fetch her around Easter. This went on for a number of years. Mother helped brought up David's two children to some extent. Eventually mother decided to live alone in an apartment not too far from the 3 children who lived in the Chicago area. I was the only one far away in North Carolina. There were few sons as tender and solicitous towards mother as David! Our mother died in 1994 and now they are reunited in Heaven. I cannot imagine the joy there. Our sister Lucy also went to heaven 5 years ago. David and Lucy both had beautiful voices. They used to sing duets together and David sang in Lucy's choir for decades! David also sang in his church choirs for many, many years. His was a beautiful baritone, Lucy was a mezzo soprano. I know in heaven they are singing duets right now!
    David worked his entire life for our half brother, Cyrus who is in the steel business (Tang Industries). David started from scratch and worked his way up. Before his death, he was in charge of one of the companies and especially in the area of sales in which he excelled. Customers loved him and trusted him. They enjoyed doing business with him because he was a man of his word. His assistants who worked with him loved him--one said, more than his parents! David had the gift of inspiring love because he was so loving and so giving. I have never met another person as generous and gentle as David. He had a wonderful sense of humor. When he entered a room, it would be immediately filled with laughter and jokes. He had a great wit and could make jokes and puns in English and Chinese--several dialects in the latter. David made people happy! When he was in the room, it just lit up; when he left, it was as if the light bulb went out. My late husband and I had lived in many countries. As long as it was in the US, David would come without fail to visit us, whether in California, North Carolina, Sedona, Az. and most lately in Ohio. After my husband passed away exactly 2 years ago, I decided to move from Sedona to Columbus to be near my youngest son. When I first came, David was in a horrendous car accident. As soon as he was well enough to drive again, he came to visit me in Columbus. Last year, he came at least 3 times if not 4, and this year, he has come twice. I tried to reciprocate his visits but not quite as often as he to me. I was so grateful to God that after he was released from the hospital this last time in late Sept., he sent for me to Indiana where I spent a wonderful week with him, supposedly taking care of him. I had no premonition whatsoever that I would not see him again, that he would be called up to join the saints in heaven just a month later. David has had a bad heart since he was in his 40's with many a stents put in even then. It was a miracle that his heart lasted another 20+ years. His was a great heart. One which can hold the joys and woes of many people. He was unfailingly kind and courteous to all people, whether it was the CEO of the company or the janitor. He had good sense in so many areas and often dispensed excellent advice to me. There are so many of us who cannot count the number of times he has treated us to repasts! Where David was, there was always good food and happy laughter! Now a light has gone out. He will not soon be forgotten by many. He has touched so many lives with his goodness and grace. I would not begrudge him perfect happiness in God's presence, reunited with father, mother and sister.... Great man casts long shadows in whose shade we ordinary mortals can rest our souls a while. He is gone, but we are still sitting in his shade. He has set a high standard for us to live up to. He did not preach with words, he preached with his life. David, we will miss you as long as we have breath! Wait for us in Heaven! A true gentleman, a gracious soul, a wonderful father, son, husband, brother and friend has left us holding his mantel. How can we emulate you? But you will want us to try! Until we see you again in Heaven, sing...sing with Lucy, sing until we join you! Remembering you always, your loving eldest sister, Lily
 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

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